A Plead to the one that got away?

First of all I would not really label it as a plead, but rather an understanding. You view me as an evil and dishonest person. It is not me who is the dishonest one. I have tried numerous times for you to understand, and while you never will, and neither will your friends; I am sorry for anything that you has made you view me as you do. I am not the one doing any of this unfortunate stuff to you. You are a great guy with great and respectable qualities. I know you could careless about what I say or think but it is something that I am pleading for you to understand. I can be angry at you and will NEVER be the same person because of my relationship with you, but I would and will never take it out on you as you and your friends claim I am/have. You have ruined so much for me and have broken me emotionally and physically. I can feel how I feel about you and I know how that is and you are just going to have to accept it. I will never be able to feel safe again with someone in my life. I will always distrust most of the people around me and being with someone new is something I will never fully allow. I can't. You have taken that ability away from me. I loved you and thought for the most part it would be something I could do. I trusted you and let you in when I should not have.

So many people blame me and see me as an ugly, promiscuous, and feared person, because of the way you have perceived me to others. Instead of keeping a promise you made to me which was to be there and be a friend. Calling me names such as weirdo don't really hurt me because I know I am not what you think. Your friends may have there own minds but you sometimes do not. They all (including you) have so much hatred towards me when I am not the person you/they should have that anger towards. I am good, but now I am broken and fear everyone around me. I sleep with one eye opened and lay with my heart closed so tight. I can never be the same Hunter again, because you have made so many people hurt me, and fear me when they have no reason to fear and be scared of me. It is this mysterious person who you should fear, and again IT IS NOT ME.
You get to live your life, and I have to pick up every piece you broke and fix things you broke. Like I said I respect you and your family and friends and I am sorry they got involved in all of this drama. I truly am. This is just so you understand how I have had to deal with reticule, harsh, and sometimes hostile behavior from people who claim it is because of you. I will always have you in my heart and love you. You have changed me, and know everything I told you was true and anything I did to hurt you I am deeply sorry. I'm waiting, the ball is now in your court.